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Kaiser Kirk

Lightbringer and former European Imperialist

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Sunday, December 31st 2006, 3:06am

The Netherlands News, Q1-1933

The Amsterdam Advocate, December 28th, 1932
The reported sinking of the Indian cruiser Male during the States-Generaal's holiday break led to a furor. Dutch shipping concerns had previously applied pressure to the Admiralty for some presence in the Red Sea, which were declined on the theory that local navies were perfectly capable. Since extensive fighting in early December, culminating in the sinking of the Male, pressure has grown and companies reportedly have called on favors long due. As a result it was no surprise when the Admiralty announced today that arrangements have been made to station ships to provide convoy service.

The Admiralty has announced the old coast defense ship Groningen will serve as flag and will be supported by the 3rd & 4th Gunboat squadrons, the 4th escort flotilla, the seaplane carrier De Groot, and a pair of tenders. The force will be based on the Red Sea in Aseb and provide a regular convoy service to all Dutch and allied vessels desirous of it.

The Hague Herald
The Royal Family announced today that Prince Alexander has expressed his desire to attend the South African Naval Academy, and has been graciously accepted. The Prince greatly enjoyed his recent stay in South Africa and the Kongo, and looks forward to the fall term.

The Hague Herald EXTRA, March 2nd, 1932
The Netherlands was shocked today by the announcement of the assassination of Herr Braun. Official condolences have already been by the Crown and the Government. The Foreign ministry has confirmed that they do not regard the insurrectionist Herr Himmler to be a legitimate contender for the German Government.

Attempts by this paper to seek commentary from the ex-Kaiser, Wilhelm II, failed. The Kaiser's estate at Huis ten Doorn was guarded by members of the Queen's Royal Guard Fusiliers. Colonel Baoel issued a statement "Due to the unsettled political circumstances in Germany, the Queen has taken measures to ensure the safety of the former German Imperial Family and isolate them from these events".

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "Kaiser Kirk" (Dec 31st 2006, 3:10am)

Kaiser Kirk

Lightbringer and former European Imperialist

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Tuesday, January 9th 2007, 8:47am

March 3, 1933

The Hauge Herald, March 3, 1933.

The Foreign Ministry's spokesman summary of events in Germany, he was asked regarding reports of Dutch Military Personnel being captured by Indian troops and issued the following statement.
"Our information is that two Dutch citizens had indeed been injured, one mortally, in the recent fighting. The Indian Army appears to followed the appropriate procedures. We have indeed been contacted by the Red Crescent organization regarding a Herr Rooijen and have the understanding that he is in reasonably good health"

Inquiries as to the reason for their presence elicited the following comment
"Im sorry, I have no information regarding their reasons"

When asked regarding the reports of reportedly new-looking Dutch weaponry being captured
"I'm sure those reports are unfounded. The majority of small arms in our arsenals are available from the companies that manufacture them. In the unlikely event they ever graced the inside of an armory, one must remember that the War Ministry regularly disposes of excess equipment and such may have made it's way to the Kingdom of Saud prior to the conflict. The Netherlands has maintained its traditional neutrality and has made no sales of traditional military equipment to the Kingdom of Saud since entry of their troops into the League of Nations Mandate."

Questions regarding the oview of the Dutch government on the conflict in general led to the following comment :

Unfortunately the League of Nations has proven regrettably slow and unresponsive. The initial calls by the Kingdom of Saud for the League to investigate border incidents went unheeded. This led to the Kingdom launching their reckless and ill-advised attack prior to the build up of Indian forces being complete. While somewhat understandable, this and the poor handling of the pilgrim camp matter has cast them in the role of the aggressor nation. War has wracked the mandate and both Yemen and Saud, many soldiers and civilians killed, all in a situation where the League was asked to intervene prior to war occurring. All and all, most unfortunate. 

War Minister Snellensoon was also approached for comment outside a popular lunchtime cafe

"The reports of Dutch civilians being injured and killed by Indian actions in the course of the Indian invasion of The Kingdom of Saud are correct." When challenged on if the two individuals were not in fact military personnel, the War Minister replied "I have been informed Captain Rooijen is a reservist and Sergeant Ermerins retired last fall,so yes they are civilians&or should I say, Herr Ermerins was a civilian prior his death at the hands of the Indian forces". Inquiries as to the reason for their presence in the Kingdom of Saud, if the Sergeants background as a drill instructor was relevant, and the reports of Dutch weapons being paraded by the Indians met with no comment other than a reference to the Minister's immanent luncheon. The press was not allowed entry to the café, and the War Ministry has refused further comment.


Tuesday, January 9th 2007, 12:16pm

Does the family of Sgt. Ermerins have a case for a lawsuit against the India Navy?


Tuesday, January 9th 2007, 2:21pm

Sounds like the Dutch government hasn't quite decided what their official line is.

Lawsuits, eh? Is there a "lawyersharp" program out there I should know about?

Kaiser Kirk

Lightbringer and former European Imperialist

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Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 7:50am

January 3rd, 1933

Ok, I agree with rocky, these squares are annoying. Particularly as they didn't want to delete. Weirdly while they would not last night when I posted it, they will this morning.

January 3rd, Bogor Palace
Prince William looked up from the pile of papers at his private security chief's entrance.

"Ahh Herr Schuyt, I have been expecting you. I trust you had a satisfying holiday week?"

"The pot does not stop boiling just because the cook is napping your Highness, I am sure I will find some way to take that time out later to enjoy it."

The prince frowned Gerrit, your lieutenants are first rate people, I treasure your efforts, but I would prefer it if you took some time to reward yourself, how about when we get back to Holland and this business is wrapped, you take a couple months off?

"I will take it under advisement sir. However, we do have some developments."


"As you suggested, Royal Dutch made the payments for the third and fourth leases to the Saudis in a number of small accounts drawn on dispersed banks. The Saudis were quite pleased with that arrangement. We have been able to establish a pattern for seven captains, a number of other crew and dock chiefs, a number of shipping clerks, Mr. Baesius the shipping coordinator, and the Jr. Snellenson. Quite simply,

"What about Snellenson Sr. or his aide, Sipke Fockes?"

"I am sorry sir, there is smoke, but it is not possible to tell if there is a flame I was saying,
within days of money being deposited to the Saudis, most of them would go to one of the branches of the various banks with the deposit, and obtain funds. There are some others, but we believe these individuals account for the majority of the "foot soldiers" of this smuggling ring.

Alone, it is not conclusive, but the investigation has yielded evidence implicating about two thirds of them.

Unfortunately, tracking the money further up the line becomes progressively harder, in particular as the financial arrangements move out of the Benelux where the House has the greatest influence.

<places papers in front of the Prince>

as you can see, the primary money is fairly easy to follow from Shell to the Saudis and then into this smuggling system. This Belgian firm of Pêcheries à Vapeur, of Ostende, appears to be a holding company, both for Zeebrugge Shipwrecking & Scrapyards, and for the Tonnelier & Schepens shipping company; but the owners of the holding company are cloaked, possibly American as many of the principles are small shell companies listed on the Chicago exchange.

It appears that Tonnelier & Schepens are engaged in smuggling and they may hand off cargos carried on the Belgian freighters to Shell freighters for final delivery in places off Tonnelier & Schepens routes. This would appear to be the initial point of contact for several of our implicated people. However, this only accounts for four of the Captains.

A further complication is that two of our Captains appear to our agents have managed to establish who some two Captains' contact people are. While the actual contact men are all European, we have managed to successfully tail them in two locations. In both countries, the contact men reported back to apparently the same Asian gentleman, an employee of a company located in Chosen, but whom is present on a Japanese passport."

"This is Mr. Takigawa whom you discussed in July? Who had discussions with Fockes?

"You recall? Ahh very good Sir, yes it is. Without becoming pointed in our inquiries we simply can not pursue that line of questioning."

Which Captains does Mr. Takigawa contact?

"Captain Daendal of the SS Dufyken and Captain Lloyd, of the SS Ascania"

"That is the British flagged ship you did not think was a likely canidate?

"The very same, the RN even stopped and searched it in the Red Sea with no result. I have no idea what is up with that. However we have some disreputable reports that the crates the SS Dufyken unloaded in Mexico may have included military goods for the revolutionaries"

"I wonder if I can rent some trained elephants..."


"Nothing Gerrit, just a tale one of the Captains stationed up in Phuket told me"

"Sir, where do you want us to take this investigation now? I have more information, and some promising leads, but we are starting to spook some of those involved. Shall we continue, pull back and wait for them to calm down, try to entrap some&

No Gerrit, we are going to arrest those we have charges...well charges the Netherlands can bear published in a court record, fire a couple of the others for no cause, and leave a couple undisturbed, step back for a while and see what they do once the smoke clears

"Well Sir, unfortunately that may be difficult, we can only stick charges on five of the Captains, and Captain Wilshaw is a British national commanding the British flagged Shell freighter SS Heldia . Of the other four, two are luckily scheduled for leave, but Captain Daendal is in the Caribbean, and Captain Van Stappen should have left Balikpapan for Manila several days ago, he will be in Pilipino waters.

Actually, we can acquire four. I believe you will find that Herr Stappen has encountered a veritable plethora of delays at Balikpapan, while I believe you willl find that the light cruiser [i]Suriname has recently left Paramaribo for Cuba and should be in the SS Dufyken 's vicinity.[/i]

"Sir, you knew these four.."

No, I knew about nine, and have made arrangements for eight.

"If you don't mind, how did you arrange the cruiser without disclosing your interest?"

Gerrit, it's no fun being Crown Prince if you can't abuse your position occasionally. I know I only earned the rank of Kapitein Luitenant ter Zee, but technically I'm Admiral of the Fleet, even if it's honorary, when I very quietly and strongly suggest to loyal Admirals that it's in the best interest of the Netherlands to send the Suriname[u] to show the flag, things can happen with very few fingerprints. Shell CEO van Seelst will simply ask if the Navy has any vessels handy to assist in apprehending a criminal wanted in the Netherlands for off manifest cargo, the Navy will happen to have a ship there. That is all."

"Sir, I am impressed."

"Thank you Gerrit, anything else, or anything I can do for you?" the prince says with a smile

"How about a quick look at that report your commission is writing, you all set to recommend we declare them independent and invite the Indians in?"

<after a mixture of laughing, choking and sputtering>

"Don't say that while I'm drinking brandy, do you know how that burns the nasal passages? Argh. I will admit it would cause half the State-General a heart attack if we did, and actually it would save us a ton of money, but far from it.

Realistically, it's not only bad for the Netherlands, but also for the locals. The cultures here are used to Confuciusan view, and their old societies were feudal kingdoms, only the educated elite could properly take advantage of independence. You'd probably see a bunch of strongmen come to power and be accepted as part of the natural order.

Whomever took over Java would have the population base to capture the other islands, where resources are. Independence would simply lead to a corrupt, chaotic government mixed with civil wars and coups. We owe them a bit more than that. The TIDE report will recommend a slow build approach with lots of little projects to create widespread opportunities and capital, then tie it together with an infrastructure backbone.

I tell you Gerrit, I'm never going to volunteer to write one of these damn things again, I thought it would be nice to have a direct say in things, but I'm simply hoping I dont get crushed flat by a toppling tower of reports.
You wouldn't want to stay around and help, would you Gerrit

"Gee, I'm sorry sir, but I have this delayed vacation calling..."

"Thank you ever so much, enjoy the vacation Gerrit

This post has been edited 4 times, last edit by "Kaiser Kirk" (Jan 17th 2007, 9:09pm)


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 3:07pm

You say you want to hire the Elephant Squad™? :evil: :D

Kaiser Kirk

Lightbringer and former European Imperialist

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Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 4:57pm

I don't suppose the Elephants go to the victim, like Ninjas...hmm Ninja Elephants. You'd have to start training them young, and they'd need thumbs...Teenage Muntant Ninja Elephants!!!


Keeper of the Sacred Block Coefficient

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Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 5:04pm

You guys are nuts.......


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 7:08pm

No! You're not nuts ENOUGH~!!! mwahahahaha


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 7:11pm

Somewhere durring the battle of the Buldge....

"Nuts? What is this nuts? I don't understand the reply!"


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 7:29pm

"I prefer Snickers, sir."


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 8:03pm



Botanical definition
A nut in botany is a simple dry fruit with one seed (rarely two) in which the ovary wall becomes very hard (stony or woody) at maturity, and where the seed remains unattached or unfused with the ovary wall. Most nuts come from pistils with inferior ovaries (see flower) and all are indehiscent (not opening at maturity). True nuts are produced - for example - by some plants-families of the order Fagales. Note that not all true nuts are edible; some (e.g. birch, alder, hornbeam, wingnut) are too small to be worth eating. Others, like the tanoak (Lithocarpus densiflorus), are bitter due to tannins and require extensive leaching before they are edible.

Kaiser Kirk

Lightbringer and former European Imperialist

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Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 10:09pm


Originally posted by Desertfox
[the tanoak (Lithocarpus densiflorus)

big tanoak good
small tanoak bad

toxicodendron diversiloba just evil.

And now back to our regularly scheduled Teenaged Mutant Ninja Elephants!

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "Kaiser Kirk" (Jan 17th 2007, 10:11pm)


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 10:22pm

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "Rooijen10" (Jan 19th 2007, 3:55pm)


Wednesday, January 17th 2007, 11:50pm

RE: January 3rd, 1933


Originally posted by Kaiser Kirk
Ok, I agree with rocky, these squares are annoying. Particularly as they didn't want to delete. Weirdly while they would not last night when I posted it, they will this morning.

I found if you place the cursor at the end of the last correct character before the square, with a space before the square, and then double delete, it will happily go away!


Thursday, January 18th 2007, 12:16am

Look! Up in the sky!

It's a bird...

It's a plane...

It's aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAA--*squish*

got peanut?

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "Swamphen" (Jan 18th 2007, 12:17am)


Thursday, January 18th 2007, 6:52am


Originally posted by Rooijen10
Go for something bigger than the Elephants.

Hmmm, must hire 2 dozen clones of Legolas and let em have at it!


Thursday, January 18th 2007, 7:04am

...The prancing elf ninny brigade invades wesworld <<

Kaiser Kirk

Lightbringer and former European Imperialist

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Thursday, January 18th 2007, 7:31am


Originally posted by Rooijen10
Go for something bigger than the Elephants.

Hmm, oversized, four tusks, few wrinkles...

Those ARE Teenage Mutant Elephants!
plus they are from Japan...They must be NINJAs !


Thursday, January 18th 2007, 8:17am


Originally posted by ShinRa_Inc
...The prancing elf ninny brigade invades wesworld <<

Heh one of those prancing elf ninny's managed to take out , what, 3 elephants?! Emagine what two platoons of em could do!