Some music for the mood.
I didn't know what to expect bringing him along. The way I saw it at the time, it was just another accommodation we had to deal with in the submersible. Another pain in my backside. Another thing that could go wrong. I do not know how I could have been so far from the truth and naive, but I do know that the dives we did that trip changed how I think about what we do. Sometimes you loose the human connection, he brought it back.
-Beppe Aleppo
May 18th, 1978. Above the South Adriatic Pit on board the seabed exploration ship Carmen Cesarina.
Despite the years that had passed since he left the Navy, the sea still felt the same under Ilario Amerighi's feet. The smell of fresh sea air invigorated his old frame and took what he reckoned to be years off his tired joints. Closing his eyes, he let is slowly fading memories carry him back to the days long past. Not all the memories were happy from those times, and the ones that came bubbling to the surface of the last time he was in these waters were some of the darkest of all. Rushing water, acidic smoke, and screams of dieing men pushed at the edges of Ilario's mind. The pain of those hours had never quite gone away, but this was the closest Ilario had come to being overwhelmed by them in years. He felt his breaths thicken as he mentally pushed back against events long resolved. Eventually all that remained were faded faces, with names he had never forgotten, silently asking "Why?". Ilario had lived with those faces for a very long time, and he once again felt raw anguish begin to boil. The sudden sound or wrenching drew in back to reality, the faces fading and taking the acuteness of feeling out of his swirling memories. "Michelina, have you gone to see the ship's doctor yet?" he inquired of the twenty-something woman who's head was hanging over the side.
"Not yet Mr. Amerighi." Michelina Nasato replied. "We are almost to the dive site and I know from experience I will be fine once we go under. Just something about the sea today." She looked up and gazed longingly at the two small submersibles hanging above the quarterdeck.
"I hope we will reach it soon, for your sake." Ilario said "As to that," he pointed at the submersible "Im still a bit apprehensive. Old fears die hard, you might say."
Michelina took a few minutes to make sure that what remained of her lunch had settled down, then went back inside the Carmen Cesarina, leaving the old man to continue reminiscing alone. Turning a corner, she ran strait into Beppe Aleppo. "Sorry Beppe!"
"Its fine Michelina" Beppe replied "sick again?"
Michelina nodded "Better now. He was out on deck again. Wonder what he is thinking about."
"I have not one gram of a idea." Beppe replied "All I know is we need room in the submersible for three and not two. Would be no fun with that old man." This was accompanied by a wink and another, more obscene, gesture.
Michelina hit Beppe playfully "You would think about doing it in the submersible. Sometimes I wonder if you will wait until we get married. Its only another few weeks."
"Indeed my special fiocco di neve," Beppe replied in a highly dramatized romantic voice "there will be much time for that later. Now, go see to your charts and such, we dive in a few hours." With a kiss, Beppe spun around Michelina and made his way outside bent on attending to his submersibles. Ilario was still standing on the quarterdeck, once again lost to memories of times long since past.
Several hours later, the three were sealed up inside the submersible. Beppe sat at the conning station, Michelina at a secondary technical station, and Ilario in a observation seat. The submersible was designed for four, but since this was a shallower dive and they had a second submersible along with them, there was no need for the fourth crewman so the three fit comfortably inside. Ilario was visually nervous, his old sailing instincts coming back. As the submersible began is slow decent to the bed of the Adriatic, Michelina saw something that must have fallen just short of pure, unfiltered, and unbridled terror engulf Ilario's eyes. She half expected him to panic. As the submersible passed further beneath the waves without incident, Ilario began to regain his calm and replaced it with wonder. The high point was having a shark swim by the submersible at about 15m down. As the submersible sank deeper and the light grew poor, Ilario became more reflective. Finally he broke the silence. "I don't know how I feel about seeing her again." his tone was very meditative "I feel like I'm about to visit a grave of a family member, which in some ways I am. But it is very different, considering I mourn not only the men who lie in rest here," he crossed himself "but what they lie in. Loosing a ship you command, almost feels like loosing a lover, a lover who the bond is so strong with you never feel the same after she has left you. I know you have read the stories of what happened to my ship, and the official reports. But you are to young to really know what happened, what things were like." Michelina reached out for Beppe's hand, who had turned around after setting the automatic controls. Her other hand found a audio recorder. Turning it on, she looked to Ilario for approval.
Ilario nodded, and with a soft electric buzz the recorder came to life. "Please, indulge this old sailor and listen to the story of a man and his ship, his crew, and a broken soul that has never quite healed."